2017-does that mean it is safe to come out now???

Thank God it is 2017! I case you haven't noticed 2016 will not go down in history as one of the best years of my life. It seemed I went from one shit situation to another. You know things are bad when a parking inspector who is giving you a ticket (as you leave your psych's office) says " Geez love- I hope I'm your rock bottom." For the record he WASN'T. EVEN. CLOSE.

So when It was when I was  busy feeling sorry for my self, sorry reflecting, on the year that was I decided that as not all of 2016 was that bad. Because something good always comes out of something bad. So here is my list of the good things that came out of crap.

1. My faith in my friends was reaffirmed. My friends have been the bomb this year. I love them even more than I did before.

2. I reconnected with old friends. This has been an absolute highlight. It is amazing how you can have no contact for 10 years and then "bam" they are back and as much fun as ever.

3. I realised that going to get help in any form is good. I have seen both a psychologist and a psychic medium/healer this year. All were blunt, all forced me to look at my own issues (WTF-me issues??) and all made me feel hopeful, and hopefully a better person.

4. I realised that I deal with my feelings in many ways- I ate my feelings, I drank my feelings, I shopped my feelings, and I tried to ignore my feelings. None of them worked. They all caught up with me in the end.

5. I realised that sometimes you have just got to do what ever gets you through your day. For me this was smoking. A bad habit to revisit, but it made me sit still for 5 minutes, something I was incapable of doing.

6. I understood that healing is up and down. You think you have it sorted and are back and then you wake up the next day and all is crap again. Crying Monday was a favourite of mine. Not so much my friend who drove to work with me on Mondays.

7. I realised how badly some wives/girlfriends speak to their husbands. Seriously. When you don't have a partner and hear how some women bark at the men in their lives (especially at the supermarket) it's like "holy shit- calm the fuck down ladies". Men will never understand the importance of placing the groceries in a specific order at the register. As bizarre as that is... deal with it.

8. I learnt I could leave the house without mascara and lipgloss, I could just chuck my hair in a pony tail and I could carry an extra 5kgs and the world didn't fall to pieces. The same couldn't be said for my jumpsuit which I could get on but had to cut to get off.

9. I discovered the joy in being able to help out others who found themselves in a similar situation to mine. We were a little support group- and we all managed to make a little sunshine in each others lives.

10. I learnt how important it is to be kind. Everyone is going through their own shit. And while it may not be really earth shattering things like famine, war or not having the right outfit to wear - it is still shit.

10 b. You don't have to be happy all the time. I know right!!! When I heard someone say this it was like a light bulb. We are all striving to be happy all the time, and this is what is making us not happy. Some days you are majorly happy, others sad, others miserable and sometimes you just "are". And that's ok.



So there you have it. My lotus that came out of the muddy shit view of 2016. Thank you to everyone who supported me through the year and also to all the lovely people who have been reading my blog this year while I have pretty much been out of action. I promise this year I will try harder. 2017 is going to be amazing.