32 Signs I Don't have my Life together..

I came across and article today (on Facebook- so it must have some fact) and it was called= "32 Signs You Actually Have Your Life Together". It would seem I have a little way to go....
You can read the whole article here- or here is a summary for you

1. Wearing matching underwear- oh please only women in Victoria Secret catalogues do that. Don't they?
2. Cooking enough dinner to have leftovers the next day. Remembering to take said leftovers to work. Well in fairness I do make enough for left overs- but they are either eaten by someone else, or I don't feel like them it comes around to lunch.
3. Having your opal card somewhere you can actually find it- I assume this is like a Smartrider. I can find it. It's in my purse. But it has no credit.
4. Leaving the house with a fully charged phone, and remembering to bring your charger. Extra points if the charger actually works- I can do this one- I always leave home with a charged phone. 
5. Knowing your car rego by heart- I know it has in IE in it. Or is it EI???
6. Keeping receipts (and remembering where you put them) for tax. What do you mean keep them for tax? Why? You put them in the bin when you get home so you can ignore how much you have spent. Derr.
7. Going food shopping and using all of the said food before it goes off in your fridge. No one does this. No one.
8. Saturday night, two percent battery, ordering an Uber and having it arrive before your phone goes flat- my phone never goes flat. Winning
9. Meditating- I try, but I get bored and start remembering things I have to do and then I get stressed.
10. Actually being active in your activewear- I used to.. does that count
11. Having a six drink rule and sticking to it- once again- no one does this
12. Your manicure lasting more than 48 hours- if I get SNS. If not- lucky if it lasts a day.
13. Memorising your pin number like a boss - I can do this one, all 4 of them. And my pin number to the photocopier at work.
14. Losing your phone, but having a lock on it - I would never lose my phone- it is glued to my hand. And I do have a lock on it. Which I have to keep changing because I tell it to everyone anyway.
15. Those moments when you can afford to fill your petrol tank all the way up. But its such a waste of money.... thats like a new dress.... and what if the price of petrol goes down??
16. Leaving hydralyte, water and 2 panadol by your bed before you go out and remembering to take them when you come home.  Never. and you know how that water can seem sooooo far away when you wake up hungover and are dreaming of water
17. Having enough money to renew your license for 5 years- Next. 
18. Not having to lie about skills and experience on your CV- this one is easy because I have been in the same job since 2003. And I can't lie to save my life.
19. Waking up to no awkward morning-after Facebook posts- Next
20. Only loading 5 drunk snapchats instead of your regular 20. But doesn't everyone want to see the hilarious things I do with my friends??
21. Going to a farmers market and buying kale- this one is a lie. No one buys kale. And Farmers Market shut to early. Who goes out that early on a Sunday?
22. Knowing WTF to do with kale- I made kale chips once. I burnt them, but I made them. I think the burn added flavour.
23. Wearing matching socks, preferably your own. And keeping the excitement of this to yourself whilst in public. I share my house with two children and two dogs, there is no such thing as a matching pair of socks. They all live in one drawer. It's like a lucky dip.
24. Waking up at your first alarm so you can actually wash your hair - Why would you when you can sleep through it and cause yourself some morning stress?
25. When your day 5 hair can still pass thanks to half a can of dry shampoo and a top knot?
26. A streak free fake tan. Is it natural? No one can say for sure- I can do this one. It's called Bondi Sands and a mitt.
27. When your eyeliner is symmetrical and you’re like, no biggie- I can also do this as well. And if its not- just add more mascara.
28. Owning a Le Creuset- is that like a croissant?
29. Being able to cook something in your Le Creuset- why would you cook in a croissant?
30. Ordering wine by names other than ‘house red’ and ‘house white’ Sure I order the SSB, the SB, the Rose, Sparkling or the Prosecco.
31. Having at least one Aesop product in your bathroom (go for the hand soap: minimum expenditure, maximum visual impact)- I do!!! It was a present.
32. Waking up on Sunday morning and knowing who you are, where you are, and who is lying next to you- I always wake up in my bed ( I hate sleep overs) my dogs are usually lying next to me, but most Sundays I wake up having no idea where I am or what day it is.