This is how my last Saturday night went. Yours?

I'm prefacing this post with two very important points.

1. I am a lover not a fighter. I will run a mile (or 26 haha runners joke) to avoid a confrontation. The down side to this means that when I do explode- I EXPLODE.

and

2. I am THE perfect neighbour. I keep to myself, I will say Hi, but I don't want to chat, I will happily pretend I haven't seen you when I am getting out of my car, so there is no need for awkward small talk, I won't worry about what you do-if you don't worry about me, and I will be considerate if you are considerate back. I will keep a little eye out on your house if you are away and I will even get the junk mail out of your letterbox. 

So the story begins here. I live in a suburb that is both high density and a mix of owners and renters. Because of the proximity to the city and trains and major roads, this makes my suburb both super awesome but also a spot youngsters like to live in.  My house is surrounding by 8 houses. One on either side (both owner occupied) one behind (renter) one straight across the road (renter) and 4 units also across the road. Usually we have one painful neighbour, but at the moment we are lucky enough to be surrounded front and back with the neighbours from hell. These neighbours have three things in common.

1. They are in their early 20's
2. They are girls
3. They are either dumb, selfish or incredibly arrogant. 
or maybe a mix of all 3.

                             

These girls get drunk, like all the time, use THE WORST language- EVER and are really really noisy. Like really. At all hours of the night and day. This has been going on for months and being the passive aggressive person I am I have said nothing. Not even when the back neighbours decided it would be also to do sprint training up and down the driveway, or rev their car at 4am outside my bedroom, or have a fight with their boyfriend outside my bathroom window(those ones are kind of interesting) I didn't even complain when the girls across the road were having a vomiting competition to compare whose vomit was the biggest.  Because I have never complained to a neighbour. Well maybe only once when the previous tenants across the road where playing the drums really badly at 3 in the morning (and had been for 5 hours) and I went out the front over the road, in my pyjamas and yelled.Like a crazy woman. Lucky I had the cat with me for protection.

So now you have the back story, on Saturday morning I was woken at 3am when the girls across the road got home. They partied and screamed and laughed (one of them has a really, really bad laugh) until 5am. When I had to get up to do my run. 

The at 5PM, my daughter came in to tell me that there were people fighting out the front.  I went out to see one of the girls from behind us, so drunk even I was impressed that she was still standing, telling one of the other girls (loudly) that if she said something again she was going to shove something up the female part of her anatomy. IN FRONT OF MY HOUSE.  

I went back inside and told Indi with all the wisdom of a good experienced drinker, that  the girl who was would be asleep soon and it would be quiet. Well how wrong I was. I went back out 30mins later because one girl was shouting at one of the other girls who was passed out drunk on our driveway while the others were yelling at the girl who was RUNNING NAKED DOWN THE ROAD. Yes you read that correctly.

Now with the concern that the neighbours may have thought that it was me who was passed out on the driveway or running naked down the road, the volcano of "Holy shit I really hate my neighbours" erupted and out I went. ALL TEACHER VOICE BLAZING. I went out. I yelled. I told them to get their act together and have some consideration.

Then still firing on hatred of my renting neighbours I went across the road and told the girls across the road what I thought of them. I turned around feeling proud of my braveness, walked across the road to see girls on my verandah yelling at my husband wanting to know "exactly what our problem was." Ummmmm naked girls, passed out friends on our driveway and people telling people they wanted to insert things in other girls privates. Maybe???

Now at this point one would maybe expect an apology. Oh no, what followed was a good old 30 minute (at  least) argument while the youngsters tried to tell me that they couldn't be held responsible for their friends behaviour (huh?) and that the reason that they revved the car at all hours of the night was because one was a Virgin.....Flight Attendant. (double huh?- you can start a car without revving it, surely) you will also note that I have put a pause between the Virgin and Flight Attendant. This is because this is how it was explained to myself and my son. We were confused at first what the significance of her being a virgin was, and how this contributed to her being inconsiderate. Then she added the flight attendant and I was still baffled to be honest. 

                          

I will save you the rest of the details, but lets just say it involved one of their friend crying, one filming on her phone, one saying the needed to call the police ( me saying go for it- you are on my property), the other neighbour coming out and joining in, and then me realising I was standing in the street having an argument with 20 drunk people in their 20's. Then it started to rain. Then I got bored and frustrated. Then I realised that they were just dumb. So I went inside and had a bottle of wine. Because I hate confrontation. 

On a side note- they are moving on four weeks. I am praying for a nice couple with a child. Or an old couple. Or maybe just someone with some consideration.

I apologise for the use of the word bitch. But it was just so apt.

Kylie Jenner and her lips.

 If you don't know who Kylie Jenner is we can't be friends. Joking - you just need to read more gossip mags. Kylie Jenner is the youngest sister of Kim Kardashian. The gossip world has been buzzing about whether or not this young thing has had her lips done- because all of a sudden she is displaying dazzling voluptuous lips. 

In fact if you google Kylie Jenner lips you will get 2.4million hits.
Now considering the Kardashian families love of plastic surgery it wouldn't be a surprise- but it seems that the lips are a result of some very clever makeup.(Which is their other love as we have discussed before.) And a throwback to the 1990's. Yes my friends, over lining your lips is officially back!

    Like Karen Mulder in the 1990's. That hair! Those lips!

                        Not like this lovely lady's 90's lips

Now I have been trying to master this look in the last few days, and it is a little tricky, not so much in the application, but more the maintenance. As your lipstick wears off you are left with a line, so they key to this look is to colour in your whole lip with a nude liner, blending like there is no tomorrow and the reapply, reapply, reapply.

Here is a step by step. ( I did this after work so the days makeup is looking a bit pastey- as is the hair)

1. Cover your lips with foundation. Because we are trying to make the lips appear naturally bigger you want to make the natural line as invisible as possible.

 2. Get a nudish lip liner. This is just a cheap that I got from Target. It is Rimmel, and the nudest colour they have.

 3. Line around the whole lips but as close to the outside as you can without going obviously over the natural line.  Sort of like if you were colouring on the very outside of a line. The only spot to go over (slightly)is the bottom lip in the middle. Then shade in the lips with the liner but go heavier on the outsides. This will give the lipstick something to grab onto and will also ensure you don't have a obvious line. I have also shaded in the bottom lip with a really light shade to reflect some light and make the bottom lip look bigger.

 4. Get yourself a nude colour. This is also a cheapy I got from the supermarket. It is Maybelline and the lightest colour they have. Apply the lipstick to the whole lips, blend, blend, and then blend again, blot the lips and then reapply. Did I mention you need to blend?

5. And we are done. A subtle fuller lip- without looking like a porn star. Now if you are younger you can experiment more and make those babies bigger- but I have put a photo of my lips normally to show that their is a slight difference.

Also in case you are wondering- I am wear YSL Youth Liberator foundation, Stila Stay All Day Liner in Black, a sweep of Mac Brule Eyeshadow, Benefit They're Real Mascara and Nars Orgasm Blush. Shine on the forehead compliments of a day at work.

The Bachelor. Or the one one where Laurina threatens to go home. Again.

Alrighty... I am actually quite excited about tonights Bachelor because I have really missed Laurina and her face, her awesome lines ( #dirtystreetpie anyone?), and her passive aggressive digs at Jess-sorry- the other girls. The voice over guy is also telling me that there is TWO.BIG.TWISTS.

I have gone onto The Bachelor site to get the pictures for the blog and I found this. Now I don't think this is one of the BIG.TWISTS.

So they are either playing dress ups, or they have been caught "playing" dress ups.  Now that would be a twist. 

We open up at the really big house, and the girls are sitting around congratulating themselves on still being in the house,  getting rid of those five intruders and that Laurina  fell victim to "stomach issues"so she was out of there for an episode. Osher is here (does that man have the best job EVER? He rocks up for 5 minutes an episode AND he gets 'special time"with Blake)  and winner of the single date is...... Louise. Oh God really Blake? Come on the most interesting thing that girl can do is straighten her hair and change the colour of her lipstick.

Blake arrives in the chopper. Yawn. The depart in the said chopper and fly to The Hunter Valley. I think this episode we should play Australian Bingo. So far we have the Harbour, the bridge, the Opera House, the Hunter Valley and a kangaroo. And a horse and cart. They get in and Blake puts his arms around Louise and it looks really awkward. Like a Year 9 boy doing ballroom dancing lessons with a Year 9 Girl. Louise has made Blake some caramel slice. I like caramel slice.

The arrive at the Cellar Door- which incidentally is said to be the most beautiful phrase in the English language. Don't ask me why, it just is. Google it. The squish some grapes and then they squish their lips together. God I hope none of these girls have cold sores.

Back at the really big house, Laurina is home and she is feeling good. Thats good. Is "stomach issues" code for a botox topup? She has not lost her skill of back hand compliments- "So good Louise is on the date, but I didn't think she would get one." You go girlfriend. Laurina skips out of the house with the date card. The girls have started doing this dumb thing where they try to guess what the date is. And who is going. .Lucky tonight they are all right, because the are all going. (Well except for Louise because she probably has to read the news somewhere)Yep even the 'Stage 5 clinger" (Thats Laurina speak for Jess).

Back on the date Louise is reading the news. Only joking. They are having food and drinking and talking about how long they have taking to get to know each other.Blah, blah, same old, same old. She pulls out the old "family is massive" card. Blake says she is the compete package. Once again I feel the need to say "Really Blake? Really?" He gives her a rose. Really Blake? Really?

Group date time and the girls do a quick infomercial for the Ford Focus. Blake and Oshie are waiting at the studio. They are doing a quick informercial for Heart disease, and the winners get to go back to Blake and Oshers house.  Laurina is excited because she is a model, and Jess is compassionate because she has turned into a pain in the butt. Like that girl at school that always sucks up to the teacher. The girls pair off- and then grab their costumes, which happen to be rather sexy. Except for Jess and Chantal.Their outfits are no sexy at all. Although with Chantal's questionable dress sense maybe she  thought she looked fab.

                       

                 Kath, Kim and Kel get ready for their workout

Zoe and Laurina in their "highly polyester nurses outfit."

Sam and Lisa do a scene from Baywatch- but without the boobs.

 And the winners are......... Sam and Lisa. They head back to the Bachelor Pad, and make their way past the photo of Oshie and Blakie

 The girls sit on the couch and have some nibbles and some wine. They all tell each other how much they "could" fall in love with each other. I am feeling rather awkward. Strangely Lisa who is on the other side of Blake is not.

Cocktail Party time!!! Tonight is a masquerade theme. Bloody Jess is trying to guess why it is masquerade theme. Because it just is maybe? The girls are all looking like they are going to their Year 12 Ball. Osher arrives to tell the girls that ......TONIGHT THERE IS NO ROSE CEREMOANY.!!!!
Blake is going to hand out roses at the party.AND HE GETS TO DECIDE HOW MANY ROSES HE GIVES OUT. ( that must be the TWO..BIG..TWISTS)

                                          

          "So if he asks you to go round with him would you?"

Jess gets asked for a chat, Laurina has kittens. Oh god help us! - Jess has written Blake a letter. I think she IS that annoying girl at school. It is 5 pages!!!! Blake kisses her neck. She gets a rose. He must really like her, although thinking about it, he was in the chess club at school so maybe he was that annoying boy at school?

Chantal says Jess has been gone for a long time. Chantal obviously doesn't know about the letter.  Blake then takes the girls out one by one for their one on one, and when they come back they have their rose. Laurina is getting  anxious. Finally their are two left. Chantal v Laurina. Laurina is doing that whole "I don't care anymore thing." I am thinking Laurina is not a very good at coming second. Oh God- now she is doing the " I'm just going to go home thing" (again). 

                      

Is it just me or does it seem that all the girls dresses are shrinking? Or does Louise need to stop baking caramel slice?

Blake find Laurina after she has had her little hissy fit (doesn't she remember what happen to "Are you kidding me" Amber?). Then Blake goes in, gets Chantal and rips out her heart and stomps on it, by telling her they have no spark, but they are good friends. She takes it well. You just can't fake a connection.  Blakes pops her in the limo and she is gone.

Laurina walks in looking bored. Like really, really bored. And a little uninterested. As uninterested and bored as you can with a rose. This girl is really starting to reek of high maintenance.

Until next week- Connection on.

Fashion- we need to talk.

OH MY GOD! What the bloody hell is going on? I like to think of myself as an up with it, fashionable kind of chick. I buy fashion mags (I may even be one of the only ones left who does), I surf the net googling buzz words like "fashion" and "trends". I go to Pinterest when I can't think of what to wear to work. But this season you have me stumped. Baffled. Confused.  I CAN'T WORK OUT WHAT IS FASHIONABLE.

It all started on Friday night when I texted my "all things fashion" partner in crime Claire and told her that I was going to wear a trend a day. Which in theory sounded easy. Until I started looking at what I had to wear.

1. Florals. Mixed florals. You call it mixed florals, I call it wearing your pyjamas.

                          

                   Both these outfits are from Sportsgirl

2. Crop tops. Are you freakin serious? Who can wear a crop top? Well anyone as long as you are either 12 or have never had children.

                                       Sportsgirl

                                        Witchery
And anyway- when you are wearing a crop top - where do you hide your roll of fat (or stomach as it is sometimes called)

3. Double denim. You call it double denim. I call it the Canadian tuxedo.

There are some images that you can never get out of your head. For me, double denim can only mean on thing-

 Britney and Justin. I reckon Justin just DIES when he see these snaps. He defies the saying that you can take the boy out of the trailer park, but you can't take the trailer park out of the boy. Well played Mr Timberlake.


4. Eyebrows. I am confused by eyebrows. I get the groomed look, I don't get the slug look.

                Even Angelina can't rock the slug eyebrow.

And the slug look always reminds me of this

5. This pointy nail thing.

 How do you do things with these nails? How would you put your contact lenses in? Or rub your eyes? You would be constantly puncturing your eyeballs, or stabbing yourself.

6. Logo, shopping centre chic. I do the groceries. I don't need to wear it.

Really? Imagine trying to push your trolley around in those shoes. Between the wonky wheel, they slippery floor and the front heavy trolley, you would have no chance.

You can also wear- stripes, dots, pastels,white, black, lace and oversized structured clothes. So pretty much anything you want then.

On another note here is my photo of the day.

                                        "Shelves" 
This is my book shelf with cookbooks and magazines and a how to be a better runner book. Sums up my life perfectly.

The Bachelor- or the one where Laurina goes to hospital

We start at the really big house, where day is dawning. The gerls are congratulating themselves on still being there, where the discover Blake mail on the couch. The lucky winner is LISA!!! I don't get Lisa. At all. She is beige. Smiley beige, but still beige. Everyone pretends to be happy. Jess is being a pain in the butt, being over excited. I jumping ship. I am officially team Sam. If there was a tshirt, I would be wearing it.

Cut to the races. Blake is waiting. Lisa is wearing a dumb hat. Lucky she was right with her guess of the races, because otherwise she would have looked really stupid (er). Lisa is stumped as to how Blake could have arranged the whole racetrack to themselves. (I think the producers may have had something to do with it.) They pick two horses to have a race......and ....some horse wins. They start drinking. This makes me happy. I hope the race date finishes in true Australian race day style, with Lisa walking home with no shoes on, red wine stains down her white frock and Blake holding her hair while she vomits on the curb.

                   

Back in the big house, the group date card is there. Jess is gushing, Sam is missing Blake, Chantal reads the date card, Jess is being over enthusiastic now, and everybody is going except for Laurina and  Chantal. Jess pretends to be shocked that she is going.. Laurina can't hide the look of " I want to punch Jess in the face."

Back on the date, we are in someone house, sitting on their balcony. Lisa is still wearing the dumb hat. Now she is talking about babies. And family. Blake says he can see a future with Lisa. REALLY?? Geez Blake- your taste in gerls is crap. Now they have moved to the couch. Blake is giving Lisa a massage. Any excuse to get her to take that hat off. They are still talking about their feelings.  It's sooooo hard for Lisa to express her feelings, but right now she is telling Blake she could fall in love with him. She gets a rose. Blake gets a pash. See that was easy.

The next day we wake up to the dreadful news that Laurina has gone off to hospital. She has a bad tummy ache. The girls pretend to care. They are using words like "moving forward" and "connection".

Anyway enough about that- it's group date time. The girls rock up to where Blake and Oshie are waiting. WITH ANOTHER CHICK. (Well chick is pushing it, lady maybe). They are at a haunted house. Just on case you are not sure if it is haunted, they have scary music on. And the other lady is not the new competition. She is a psychic. The girls are in a haunted hospital (not the one Laurina is in though- that would have been fun.) Jess gets the first reading- she is going to find her soul mate. Sam is told she is a worrier. Blake is next- he is going to find lasting love. We don't hear anyone else's reading. They mustn't be going to find love. The girls go on a tour, and are getting mad with Jess who is clinging to Blake like superglue. OMG- there is a ghost! A really bored ghost. Oh no its not, its Lauren. Blake realises she has had no air time (because she was boring),so he takes her for a "walk" Blake talks about whether or not they will be "going forward". Meanwhile the girls are having a very passive aggressive conversation with Jess. She either doesn't get it, or she very much gets its and it playing the game.( My vote is for the latter)

Blake comes back in and takes Jess for a walk. Sam nearly falls off the couch. Zoe is feeling wronged by Jess, and Sam is talking about how Jess is not self aware. I not sure what that means.

Date is O.V.E.R and we are getting ready for.....COCKTAIL PARTY TIME.

                          

     Is it just me or does Louise look like a newsreader?

The girls aren't happy though- the vibe is off (once again- what does that mean?).  Blake rocks up and says that he has seen Laurina. She is in high spirits, or maybe thats the painkillers.(I made that up- Blake isn't allowed to crack jokes) Chantal goes and has a chat with Blake. She tell him that the girls all think Jess has it in the bag. Blake gets a bit defensive. This is the first time Blake has shown any real emotion. You go Blake!  Chantal starts to cry because I think she realises that she has just blown it with Blake. Bummer.

                      

The girls are now getting stuck into Jess. Lauren is just standing there. Sam and Blake have a chat. Blakes little eyes are sparkling. And he brings out the old " I can see you as someone I can see a future  with" chestnut. FOR THE SECOND TIME TONIGHT.

Lets just get this rose ceremoany over and done with. Laurina gets her rose in hospital (that would have been a good date to see- Laurina yelling at Blake " See this is what happens when you make me eat a dirty street pie."
and Blake saying "Will a rose make it better?"
"Shit yeah!")

It is down to two girls Jess and Chantal -  Hang on!  The ghost from the haunted house is there- oh no - its Lauren. Jess gets her rose. Chantal is kicking herself for talking to Blake. And the loser is LAUREN. Because she is both boring and a bad actress and can't pretend she feels a "connection" with Blake. The final of the intruders have gone. What a waste of casting those newbies were!!

And then there was 6. Well 7 really if you count the one in hospital from a dirty street pie.

photos via The Bachelor website.

I have been a very bad Blogger recently

                     


I understand that my blogs have slowed to a very slow trickle at the moment, and I am sorry. I don't know how you are managing to get through your days without my daily updates of nothing very important.

                                                          

I have no excuses instead to say, I have been really, really tired lately. In teacher terms it is called Term 3  week 8 tired, which means at this stage of term 3 you are stressing about getting your Year 12's ready for exams, all their assessments in, and realising how much of the curriculum you haven't covered yet. The kids are also tired, so they are being naughty, and Year 9 boys are always just Year 9 boys. (thats code for smelly and stupid).

I am also marathon tired which means I am sick of training, I am sick of being worried about not having trained enough, and I am sick of being worried about finishing. I am also sick of being always a little bit hungry. Now I must state that the hungry is because I am running really really stupid long distances while still attempting to shave a few extra kgs of my nowhere near emancipated runners frame.

                                                         


I am also a little bit sick of the weather, and the fact that on Saturday I wore my most expensive pair of shoes out and the got wet. (to clarify my most expensive pair of shoes are my running shoes-$220!!!)

My poor body is tired, my nails need a manicure because I picked off all my shellac because after one chips the temptation to bite the rest of is just too much  (don't do it by the way- your nails look really really bad underneath),  my toes need a pedicure, my hair needs colouring, and basically it is all falling apart (not my hair, just everything, although my split ends are sort of falling apart) AND did I mention that my glued together foot is STILL sore?

But in the aim of keeping every bodies spirits up, I will do my very best to blog. I had intended to post a photo a day September challenge, but I forget the first 8 days of September. So I will begin today on the 8th.

8th day photo is..... ME.

So here is Me- bad roots and all, after a day at work, AND a staff meeting. AND a class of Year 9 boys.

The Bachelor- or the episode with Bikinis, Booze, Blake, Boats and Bitching

 I'm a little bit concerned that my blog may be a little bit mean tonight, because I am feeling not very happy. Reason number 1 is that I have temporarily misplaced my phone. I say misplaced because the thought of having lost it is almost too awful to fathom. I am hoping it is sitting on my desk. Reason number two is that today I am terribly hungry. Well not hungry as such, but that hungry where you just want to eat. So I have made a cake. As you do when you are on a diet. 

Maybe I should be playing the Bachelor drinking game. Everytime someone says the words "amazing", "go for a walk", "connection", "excited", "let your guard down",when  Blake giggles , or you see a Sydney Harbour shot, you drink.

So here we go and I will try to be kind. Our episode begins with the girls talking about it how awesome it is now that Amber has gone home. Osher is here! And tonights surprise is........ TWO DATE CARDS. A Single and a Group Date. AND THEY LEAVE IN AN HOUR. Open those envelopes bitches you have some getting ready to do! Single date is ....Jess. And lets just say Jess is a touch excited. Laurina not so much. In fact she even cracks a facial expression when she is trying to make fun of Jess.

                   
 The group date girls, all secretly wishing they could put their sunnies on.

Group date is.....Chantel, Rachel, Lisa, Mary, Zoe and Sam. Amazingly the girls are all really happy they are going on a group date. Blake has arranged for a boat (amazing) to go on a cruise of the Harbour.(drink) And here comes Blake in a dumb hat.  Hang on- am I hearing a little lisp from our Blakey? The girls strip down to their togs and Blake, thank God, takes off that stupid hat. He and Rachel go for a walk (drink) have an awkward chat, where they have nothing to say to each other. NOTHING,ZIP, ZILCH. I am feeling awkward now. Time to move on Blake.

               Harbour Shot. Double drink for the dumb hat.

To Sam.  I like Sam. If I wasn't team Jess I would definitely be team Sam. Blake is rubbing lotion on her back, and they have the same conversation that they had last night. We get it Sam, you are worried about letting your guard down and you have been hurt. Maybe you should have thought about that before you went on a competition to win the heart of someone you don't know?? Sam professes her love for Blake, and he rewards her with a rose. It is sort of like that moment when someone says "I love you" and you say "Cool".

                                                                                                     
                         God help us- they are dancing

Back at the really big house, the girls are chatting to Jess about her upcoming date. Laurina tells us how she is threatened by Jess. Laurina is now bitching and making fun of Jess. WHERE IS THIS COMING FROM? She has really let her guard down. (drink)

Harbour Shot (drink), back on the boat, back to some bitching. I am starting to get the idea that maybe Lisa doesn't really like Blake all that much.  I think she has just come along for the ride.

Single date time with Jess, who is dressed in a seriously weird outfit. I am hoping she was dressed by the wardrobe department, because if that was just something she had her in bag, that is some weird shit. They arrive at a train station, suitable for her "old fashioned views and values". Jess is excited (she is excited a lot. I can slowly feel her becoming a tad annoying). Blake says they have a connection (drink)  A man with a very weird voice tells them it is time for high tea.

                       
This was the only shot of the dress I could find. It doesn't do it justice- it is way uglier than this!!!

Back to the really big house. Chantal, Sam and Laurina are bitching about Jess. Laurina says Blake needs to be overexposed to Jess to work out that she is painful (I may have paraphrased that). Back on the train (and let me say this is nothing like the Armadale line) Blake says their connection (drink) is still there. Jess is opening up, but I am distracted by the little fascinator that is slowly falling out of her hair. They move to the back of the train and it is amazing (I would be soo drunk by now) and they kiss.  HANG ON- you can't kiss before you get your rose!!!!!

The most boring date in the world continues and they are going on a romantic row in a boat on a lake. I momentarily get excited, hoping they might do a Brigit Jones/ Hugh Grant moment. No such luck. But they are doing this weird shit where they keep touching forehead. I need some subtitles. They pass again.  Oh my God, Blake has just asked Jess if she believe in love at first sight? I think our Blake is in love, because lets face it, I don't think he is that good and actor.  And she gets A ROSE!!!!! They pash, and the boat flips over. ( No it doesn't ,I was just hoping.)

Jess is home and walks in on them bitching about her. Laurina agrees with me that the dress is crap. The girls pretend to be interested in the date. Hang on is Chantel wearing a parachute tracky? Sam is getting worried, but she does have a connection with Blake, so not too worried. Laurina on the other hand......

 Chantal's questionable taste in clothes is on show again., and why is Rachel matching the curtains? And who is that girl with the dark hair?

Cocktail party time!! Louise has had her roots done, so Blake takes her for a walk. Mary (she is a new one) wants to talk to Blake. Rach (the other new one) is nervous because she is boring. Lisa is "approached"-thats code for "lets go for a walk, so you get some air time and I don't have to take you on a date." Zoe is starting to get narky with Lisa, hang on so it Laurina, and Jess and Chantal- OMG this is getting hectic!!! Jess "bumps"into Blake, they are hugging, Laurina is about to pop a vein. 

I'm sorry-you are not Australia's Next Top Model.

Rose Ceremoooannnyyy time!!!  Oshie arrives And OMG TWO ARE LEAVING THE REALLY BIG HOUSE. Poor Osher has to do all of Blakes dirty work. Lisa gets a rose...Louise with her blonde roots gets a rose......Chantal and her boobs get a rose.... Lauren (who?) gets a rose... Laurina whose face is becoming more relaxed by the minute gets a rose. We are down to three, Mary, Boring Zoe and Boring Rachel. Boring Zoe gets the rose. Surely this must be a mistake??? Mary was cool.

Anyway off the evictees go into the car, over the Bridge and far away. Lucky they are both from Sydney so they don't have far to go.