The Bachelor. Let's blog this baby

I am starting the blog with a disclaimer. I know someone who knows someone who knows someone who knows the Bachelor. Ok I am exaggerating. I know the Bachelor's Aunty. Yep. Yes indeedy. The Bachelor and I are so close we are almost best friends. ( Well we would be if we met.) So with this in mind, and being mindful of the fact that his Aunty reads my blog. I will attempt to only say nice thing. Well kind of nice. Oh ok, maybe not too mean.

So, I never watched the last season of The Bachelor because there is so much about it I just don't understand. Mainly why would anyone put themselves in a situation where they have to compete for a man, and then stand by why the man (who is, of course the love of their life) dates someone else. Huh? My ego just couldn't deal with that. But as I am off singing shows and I tried the Block, but that was just like one big music video where they talked a lot, sung to the radio , the boys do the work whilst the girls go shopping, the product placement was INSANE and they did shots in slow motion.SLOW MOTION!!!! I feel I have no choice but to turn to The Bachelor.

This seasons Bachelor is a real estate agent ( which we all know is code for " I was actually a stripper before I went on the show, but I can't say that") is decent looking and has a voice smoother than chocolate. He has been unfortunate in love and has never found the "right girl". Mmmmmm he looks like that, has that voice and can't find a girl. Call me crazy am seeing issues. (although his Aunt does assure me he is a nice boy.)

This is Blake Bachelor. You may not recognise him in this shot because he is wearing a shirt.

The show begins with our Bachelor standing on a cliff, he watches sunsets and then he is on the beach. Watching sunsets. The wind would be blowing through his hair ( if he had any) He wants to fall in love and believes their is the right girl out there for him. He just hasn't met her yet. Could he get any more perfect?

Here is Andrew G. Sorry Osher. Honestly why did he change his name? Does he think no one remembers Australian Idol?

Andrew G sorry Osher introduces us to The Bachelor, Blake. He is 31 from Perth. He runs with no shirt on, he watches more sunsets. When he does put on a shirt it is in slow motion. He wears tight shirts. He auctions houses. He walks on beaches. Alone. Again.He has had his heart broken. He throws pebbles in the beach. Omg he wants kids. OMG he has no dad!!!  We meet his mum,and Gran-  He is holding a baby. He really, really wants to be a dad. A GOOD dad. He is almost too good to be true. Before we know it he is shirtless again - we see him getting dressed once more. (Dude put a shirt on. Oh ok maybe not quite yet.)

Here come the girls, who are all there to find true love and a career in the media, or at least a photo shoot in a girly magazine.

 Holly is 23 and athlete, well she plays netball. She watches the water as well. They have something in common. She goes to the gym ( but she wears a top).
Anida  is a dog groomer from the country. She needs to move from a dog to a man, um ok.
Sam 25 from Melbourne. She watches the ocean as well. She can BBQ.  She is more than blonde hair and fake tan. Arn't we all babe.
Diana is like the Princess.Crazy. She is 28 and very immature, sorry Girly. She collects fluffy toys.  I am seeing stalker psycho girl.
Chantel is 26 and she runs- with a top on. And wants love. She is an interior designer. She wants a husband.

It is time for the Glam Cocktail party- they need to make a good first impression.
And here's Blake!!!!! looking very dapper, and kind of like he works at Myer in the suit section. He likes eyes and a smile (that's code for boobs.) He wants the spark, and he is going to be respectful. The producers are just hoping not too respectful.

The music is amping up things are getting real. We are getting excited. Then we have an ad.

That hot chocolate voice says he is ready.
The limos rock up and Blake is waiting.
 It's Holly. They flirt. It's awkward. She giggles. Blake says Holly has hit a home run.
Next is Sam. She nearly falls ( Blake would have caught her) She takes control. Blake is taken back. She is nervous. She is rambling. It is awkward. Blake says she doesn't know she is beautiful.( Really Blake, Really? She has gone on a tv show to compete for a husband. I think she has an idea is is genetically blessed.)
Emma is 31 from Melbourne. She has short hair. She won't last long. She is an interior designer. She only gets 5 seconds of air time. 
Amber is 26 from Qld. She is from Canadia originally.
Chantelle. She has a gift. Its a heart with a chain. She made it. It is dumb
Jessica is 24 and from Sydney. She gets a violin playing and believes in romance. She is nervous. It's awkward. I think I see a spark. And not just from her dress. Blake is distracted. And gets a kiss.
Bridgit- nothing
Tiana- Nothing
Cara- zip
Lisa- Nothing
Lauren is on roller skates. Blake laughs. At her.
Louise 26 is an events planner from Qld. She arrives with a drink. It's her signature cocktail called lovely Lisa. Lisa needs some more extensions in her hair. She won't last long.

Cut to the girls talking about how hot he is and how nervous they all are. The pretty girls are all rattled by being in a room the same level of pretty.

The next limo arrives.

Yay Anida is here (yes I know her name is Anita, but if she says Anida, I say Anida). She trips. And then yanks up her dress. She says to pronounce her name just remember "I-need- her". She is nervous. And then she sings. I die. So does Blake.
Next is Amanda
Alana
Zoe
Shannon
Carla with a K
Emma
Stacey- Louise 
They get no air time. I am guessing none of them is the winner.

Diana is in love. She is wearing a Tiara. I would die if I wasn't already dead from the song from Anida. She bought Blake a crown. I die. Again. She speaks like a 5 year old. Like? every thing? she ?says? is ?a question?

Diana, we all think we are Princess's. You just learn to keep that dialogue internal.

Samantha- she also has short hair. She gives Blake a soft toy. She has crazy eyes. Apparently women are intimidated by her. Nope not intimidate just freaked out by the crazy eyes. And the soft toy thing.
Katrina bought her guitar. She is going to serenade him. She tells a back story to her song. She can sing. Blake starts dancing. Maybe stop dancing Blake. I think the reason he is single
Laurina is a fashion entrepreneur (nope, no idea what that means either) She introduces herself and walks off. Well played Laurina, well played.

So the girls have some booze, so it should start getting interesting. Someone has called " Game On!"and I think we have just found the drinking game for the season.
Here comes Andrew G, sorry Osher. He tells them that they need a rose. Some will get a rose during the party. Or at the end of the show. There are 24 girls and only 20 roses.  Lisa tells us that a rose means if you are staying or going. Thanks for that.

Hang on there is a twist. The white rose!!! This goes to the women who has made the best impression. The chick with the white rose gets a free pass for the first two ceremonies. . The girls want the rose. They are going to fight for it. (That noise is a sigh of relief from the producers).

Osher introduces Blake.The girls squeal. Blake is overwhelmed. By all the sequins in the room. And the fake tan ( I hope they do not have white towels in the mansion) He gives the girl a talk and toasts them. So they will drink up, which always makes for better television

They are all single and ready to mingle. He chats to groups. The girls all try to out girl each other. It is reminding me of a year 8 class where all the boys are struggling to be the alpha male.

Blake comes and grabs Holly. She suddenly becomes the most hated girl in the mansion. She works in real estate as well. OMG so much common ground.I live in a house Blake, does that mean we have something in common?Oh no- two girls have gate crashed. If looks could kill those two would be dead.

At this stage I am starting to feel a little bit sad for those girls who are on TV looking so desperate. I am feeling uncomfortable. Thank god there is an ad.

Ok at this stage I need to ask how is he going to keep that voice up all season. Surely Mr Lindt chocolate can't stay that smooth forever?

Anida is getting aggressive. She is going hunting. Ok- now she really needs to remember she is aiming for a man not a dog. She wants to talk to Blake. Blake disses her. She says she is not aggressive enough. MAN not dog Anida. Man not DOG.

This is Anida, from the country. Not Jodie Gordon from Home and Away. She is bat shit crazy.

He and a blonde chick are talking about kids. ( oh Blake she already has the two of you shacked up with 6 kids, and she has them all named. Blake Jnr, Ben, Bob, Brittany, Belinda and Boris)

 The girls are chatting about impressions. Laurina - (I'm sorry THAT nose is not real,)  says she is classy. Note to self, if you have to say it you probably aren't. She is being very aloof and hard to get. She is making Blake work for this. And then she leaves. Huh? Again? She has a major game plan. I think we have also just found out why she is single. Amber is onto Laurina's plan. Well either that or they have both read the dating book The Rules. 

The ladies are still drinking. The girls are still talking about how hot Blake is. BUT STILL NO ROSES.  Laurina says all her ex boyfriends look like Blake. Yawn.

Jessica and Blake are talking about family. They are talking about love. They can talk. They are getting along. The other girls can see that spark. They are getting worried. Blake is going to ask.....damn it they get interrupted. Jessica tells her nicely to rack off. Laurina is watching from the window. Her classy persona is fading into evilness. 

This is Laurina. She is classy and in case you forget she will remind you.

Katrina has a one on one. Blake asks her why she did not apply her fake tan properly. ( maybe she was busy singing love songs)Ok I made the bit about the fake tan up but it is a good question. Oh god! Blake has asked her to wait. Omg she is getting a rose! The other girls are going MENTAL.  She would be looking really happy if her botox hadn't frozen her forehead and rendered her incapable.

Katrina is a singer. I think she sings two types of music. Country and Western

Pyscho Anida is getting more psycho by the moment. She is pacing. She is crazy. She finally gets Blake. Blake looks scared. Oh god Samantha is going to cut in. DON"T DO IT! She will kill you.Ohhhh she did it. Now unfortunately I can't tell you what happens here because at this stage the cat has pissed on my daughters bed, so I have to go and sort that out. But safe to say, none got killed, but plenty of death stares where exchanged.

This is crazy. Sorry Samantha

He talks to more girls. More cuts to jealous faces, more bitchy comments, more close ups of angry faces. Blah, blah, blah, I'm getting bored .....hang on he is going inside. Is he?? YES he is getting the white rose. It's going to be Jessica. I can feel it

It's yours Jessica. I saw the spark.

Who is getting it? He walks past the girls on the veranda they are wondering as well. And then he walks up to........Holly. (huh? really?)

This is Holly. She got the white Rose. Yep I was surprised as well.

Osher calles Blake inside. He goes and ponders where is heart is at, by the fire while flicking through their photos on an iPad. ( I'm sure he can see their soul).

The are called back. The line up like Australia's Next Top Model. He calls their names one by one. Except for the final four. Two are chicks with short hair (see I told you they wouldn't last long).Luckily he also weeded out some crazy. 

They give each other fake smiles and hugs (haven't they only known each other for a few hours)

I can't wait for tomorrow night. Well except for the fact that I will be at the football. I will have to watch it online. Or not.

This months diet is.......

Sooo you all know how I am trying to always lose that elusive 7kg that I have managed to find in the last 12months? Well I thought you might like to know that I have started ANOTHER attempt to ditch that final 5kgs of flubber. In my defensive and hoping so I don't come across as someone with a raging eating disorder and body image issues I am also running a marathon in two months. My training has fallen into a hole due to a never ending cold, and a week in the snow, so I want to ditch the weight to try and make the run a little bit easier. (Seriously climb the stairs holding 5kgs and see how much harder it is. Imagine running 42.2km with that.)

So, so far this year I have gone back to Weight Watchers ( I was thinking about food the whole time). I did lose some weight though, 2kgs which has stayed off. Weight Watchers does work, but it feels too hard at the moment.

Next was the 5:2 diet, which was ok. The two fasting days were hard, but I could do it. I also liked that I could still go out for dinner on my 5 days. The only problem was that I didn't put on any weight, but I didn't lose it either. I also wonder if it had anything to do with the fact that I couldn't shake the cold that plagued me since April. I also found myself craving cakes. White cakes with buttercream frosting to be precise.

Next was 5 days of snowboarding. By far this would have been the BEST diet EVER because the combination of being completely and utterly exhausted, using every single muscle in my body and adding in the fact that I was completely terrified and freezing meant that I lost weight as well as eating more in my life time than ever before.

So what is next? Well I was deciding between going back to Weight Watchers, dropping carbs out of my diet, and getting fat, and then it clicked. I love plane food. I love the fact that you get a cute little tray with your food on it and you don't have to give it a thought. It is kind of exciting when you take the lid off and see what little surprise is underneath. I am also sick to death if thinking about, planning, and counting calories.

So as I figured I had two choices. Jenny Craig or Lite'n Easy. Jenny Craig meant I had to go in to a centre and talk to someone, and Lite'n'Easy meant I could order online and talk to no one. Jenny Craig had also got a really bad write up in The Women's Weekly ( there goes that advertising deal). So Lite'n'Easy it was. Even though the advertise with those annoying women from The Block.

It actually was easy. I got online, I worked out what meal plan I needed (1500 calories a day), chose what I wanted (I'm not going to lie, that bit was fun.) and then wait until Thursday for it to arrive. Which was a downer because I like to start a diet on a Monday. So Breakfast, Lunch and Dinner and snacks for 7 days were ordered $153. I can deal with that.

I ate carefully from Monday to Thursday and on Thursday afternoon I arrived home to the great esky of surprise. I unpacked all my meals, made room in the freezer and fridge, impressed Indi with my science experiment of what happens when you put dry ice in a glass of water. Actually if I am being honest I impressed my 17 and 19 year old as well.

So I am into day 3 and I am doing ok. Hungry but ok. When the say Lite they mean lite.  It has been an eye opener about how big my normal portion sizes are, so that is taking a bit of getting used to. I also find it weird to go to the grocery shop and not get anything for me. I have found that I can't watch cooking shows either. It makes me hungry.

I had to do some swapping around because my mornings are really rushed and I don't have time to cook eggs. This also meant that I had to be careful what I swapped the days with because some of the food has used by dates, and the food does need to be eaten in some kind of order. 

The breakfasts are way more than I would normally ever eat, but the lunches, and dinners and snacks are way smaller than I would normally eat. But the variety is good. The dinners are ok, because I don't have a problem with frozen meals, but they need some more vegetables (you can add some) and I can see that in time they will get a little boring. It is "real" food albeit not much of it.

They recommend doing 40 minutes of exercise a day, which is fine for me because I average 45km running a week and 2x7km walks, and lots of water, which is also no problem because you need to drink something to make you feel full.

The downer I can see is that it is not as flexible as Weight Watcher or 5:2. At least with those two you can negotiate around your food choices if you are going out for dinner. I have dinner tonight at Mexican and as much as I want to ditch the 5kgs, I can never say not to Frozen Mojitos and Chili Con Queso dip. I am hoping that my16km run yesterday will help to balance it out a bit.

I am hoping that my hunger will start to settle down in the next few days, because I am finding it really hard to go to sleep hungry. I will keep you posted on Thursday to see what the weeks result has been!

Here is a link to the Lite"N"Easy Website as well as Weight Watchers and Jenny Craig if you would like to do some looking.

images via Pinterest

I am also working on my post- What I have learnt in my 30 years of being on a diet. I feel if anyone is qualified to write that post it is me!

Masterchef- Let's get some real challenges.

In case you haven't worked it out I am a cooking show tragic. I loved Masterchef when it was English and hosted by Gary and John. I embraced the first few seasons of Australian Masterchef because it was nice, and fun and the contestants didn't take themselves too seriously. Well ok maybe a few took themselves seriously, but the majority were ok.

Now if they bought Matt Moran back........

Then they started cooking dumb food. And they started crying. They all had a sad story. The food all meant so much to them. Winning Masterchef was going to change their lives. Mostly the thing that got to me though was the dumb food, and the even dumber challenges. I want to see them make food that I would want to make.

So I stopped watching. I have just in the last week watched some episode because there is nothing else on TV- although I am considering committing to The Block next week. Man that Jamie was a dick. I noticed, however that nothing had changed. The food was still obnoxious, they called food weird things- my favourite is still when a chef said he was adding lactose instead of saying he was adding cream. And the dishes looked like this

This is ice cream. The twigs are chocolate. Apparently it looks appetising.

and the dishes that reminded them of their childhood looked like this

Food from my childhood was meatloaf with an egg in the middle, definitely not artichokes with a mushroom salad and quail.

So I decided that Masterchef needs to get real. It needs some real challenges, and food that people can attempt at home.

At this stage I think it is important to say that  two occasions I have applied to be on cooking shows. The first I applied for was the second season of Masterchef. I was so sure I would get in that when I found out the auditions were on I quickly went back and checked my emails. What??? They didn't want me. The other I applied for was My Kitchen Rules. I got as far as an interview and got told to "keep it a secret". I figure that as the season starts filming in a few days it is safe to say that I didn't make the cut. ( Big mistake Channel 7- I would have been television GOLD.)

So here are my challenges for Masterchef.

1. You have to prepare a meal for a family of 5. Mum is on a low carb diet, dad has started Cross Fit so will only eat Paleo,  son doesn't like vegetables, daughter is going through a vegetarian stage, and the youngest hates mince. Each family member will be home at  different times so the meal has to be able to be reheated.

                                           

2. There is no tomato sauce in the house. Make something an 8 year old will eat.

3. It is Sunday night. You have to make an appetising meal with what is in the pantry and fridge. It is not allowed to involve an egg, toast, or two minute noodles.

4. You have to create a delicious meal for the family. You have an hour to cook the meal, and you also must help with homework, take a phone call from your mum, make tomorrows lunches, get a child in the shower,feed the animals, and yell at the kids at least 3 times to set the table. You must also factor into that a winning argument on why you have to sit at the table.

5. You have the extended family over for Brunch. You also have a raging hangover. GO.

6. You have to make a dinner for the family and then you discover that someone has eaten the vital ingredient. What do you do to create the meal?

7. You have been given a Donna Hay dessert recipe to make. You must make the recipe successfully AND look like the picture

This is Donna Hay molten Peanut Butter and  Chocolate fondant cake. I can say with 100% certainty if you make it, it will not look like this.

8. You have to make a risotto and you are not allowed to have a glass of wine.

9. You have to make feed a family who of 5 on a budget that is not allowed to involve pasta, rice or mince.

10. You have to get children to clean the table, wash the dishes, dry the dishes, put the dishes away and wipe down without whinging, or being yelled at.

Now Masterchef, if the winner could do all this, THEN I would be impressed.

all images via the Channel 10 website and Pinterest

Things Perth people never say

I remember last year (or was it the year before) there was a little video that came out about "Things that Perth people say." It went viral - well as viral as something in Perth can get-and everyone had a good laugh at themselves.

This week one Melbourne news website had a story called " Things Melbourne people NEVER say." It was funny and got me thinking about things that Perth people NEVER say. Once I started writing the  ideas flowed. So here it is, my list of things Perth people NEVER Say. 

• "Perth drivers are really considerate, and they are great at merging"
• "Hey- lets go out for dinner at 10pm, everything will still be open"
• " I really want to go to Adelaide for a holiday."
• " I really don't want to go to Bali this year, but if I do I'm totally staying in Kuta- with all the classy people."
  
  
  
  
  

  

  BALI- the most northern suburb of Perth.

  
  
• "You never come across any road works."
• " That Elizabeth Quay is a really good use of money."*
• "That Colin Barnett, now he is a top bloke."
• " Have you got $3 for a coffee."
• "Don't worry about bringing me back a box of Krispy    Kremes from Melbourne/Sydney."

These are Krispy Kreme's. They are not available in Perth, so this means that Perth people buy boxes of them at the airport to bring home, this makes them rare, so people eat them, even though they are actually kind of revolting.

• " No need to drive, it is super easy to get a cab."

This is a taxi. Take a good look, because on a Friday and Saturday night, this will be the only place you will see one

• " It is so good to see all those cyclists out on a Saturday and Sunday morning. I don't mind sharing the road with them at all."
• "What's road rage? We don't have that."
• " You can always find parking in Mt Lawley."
• " You have not lived until you have been to the Bell Tower."

This is the Bell Tower. I don't get it either.

• "There are just not enough Asian restaurants in Vic Park."
• " Train travel after 7pm is always safe, especially from Crown Casino"
• "Perth is so affordable to eat out."
• "Customer service in Perth is really good."
• "That Zac Dawson, now he is a good football player."

"DAAWWWSON"

• "You never get stuck at traffic lights."
• " Perth drivers are really considerate. They always stay left unless overtaking."
• "Rottnest is a really affordable family holiday."

Rottnest, where a weekend will cost you as much as a week in Bali.

• "I don't know anyone who works FIFO."
• "What's a cashed up Bogan?"

• "No one is Perth has a white fluffy dog."
• "I wish there were more hipsters in Perth."
• "There really need to be more Growers Markets in Perth
• "We will just grab something to eat at the football for the whole family, it is a cheap day out."
• " You can buy a house for next to nothing in Perth."
• " Go ahead and try and pat the black swans. They are really friendly."

Black swans. You can not call your self a West Australian until you have been chased by a black swan.

• "What is cross fit? Is that something that happens when you get fit? You get cross?"
• "Everyone knows where Darch is."
• "Telethon, now that is a quality 24 hours of television.
• "Sharks? No, not a problem here."
• "Lets go and get a Starbucks."

This is Starbucks. We don't have that yet in Perth

• "You can definitely support both the Dockers and the Eagles.

There is my list. Please feel free to add your own to the list.

*Disclaimer- I actually do think the Elizabeth Quay is a good idea, I just wish they would hurry up and finish it.

images via Google

Please don't let this be true, do I really have all the clothes I want and need?

Zara- once we were best friends.

A few weeks ago I paid a visit to my spiritual home- Zara. I was so excited because a trip to Zara for me always means some new good basic clothes, that are affordable and look good. I had cleared some room on my credit card, ensured there was some space in my daughters suitcase (If there is one thing I have learnt in my 43 years packing light is a skill I really don't possess). I was ready. 

I have a routine at Zara. I call it shopping properly. Shopping is after all an art form. Step one is to walk through the whole shop. Each section, slowly , looking around picking up nothing. While you are looking around you take in the clothes and mentally take note of what you have, what you need, what you need to replace and what you just "have to have or you will die."

The next step is to go back and go through section by section. At this stage you can pick things up an pop them under your arm. Depending on the time of your visit you really want to avoid the change rooms - peak hour (lunchtime, and weekends) the line for a change room can be massive, and no one has time for that when you are on a shopping deadline. 

Final step is to head for the till, grab a few black and nude camisole tops on the way and you are done.

Well my last visit saw me do my first step and find NOTHING. Second step STILL NOTHING. Third step was not required. I was gutted. A failure. I had let myself down. Hell Zara had let me down. I felt like I had been stood up and kicked to the curb . ( For the record I went back the next day to check I wasn't guilty of just a bad shopping day - as if- and bought an umbrella, only because it was raining and I couldn't find one anywhere else).

Last week I received an email from another shop I go to saying I had a $100 reward voucher to spend. I went into the shop and the same thing. I found NOTHING. I was in a real bind because it had to be spent. By THAT DAY, and by not spending it would be like throwing away money. I finally bought myself a pair of winter weight black slouch pants. To accompany the pair of summer weight black slouch pants.

I am officially have silver status. I received a $100 voucher. This pales into insignificance compared to how much I have spent to become so special.

Then an horrific thought popped into my head. Is it possible I have everything I already need????? I received an email from a clothes store telling me or the things I needed in my wardrobe RIGHT now. I got a bit excited because I thought it would give me something new to buy. And then I realised I already owned EVERYTHING. ON.THE. LIST.

Skinny jean- check (in black and blue)

These are the skinny jean I am loving this winter. They are from Sportsgirl and they call the jeggings, Don't let the name put you off. They are super comfy and look good.

Striped tube skirt - check

This one is from Sportsgirl. I got mine 3 years ago.

Striped top - check (in long sleeve, short sleeve, blue and black)
Black sunnies - check (4 pairs)

To you they may look the same- to me they are all very different

Jacket -check
Scarf- check ( about 10)
Boots - check ( low heel, high heel, short, long, black, brown)
Birkenstocks- check
Ballet Flats- check
High Peeptoe mules -check
Chambrey shirt - check 
Chambrey dress shirt- check

This one of from Sportsgirl- I got mine at H&M

Boyfriend jean- check
A chunky knit jumper - check
White, black grey tshirt- check (in all different textures, sleeve lengths)
Embellished tshirt - check

Who doesn't like some sparkle?

Ethnic dress- check
Sneaker- check

My new trainers. One of my students today told me they were dope. I am assuming this is a good thing.

Drape pant- check (in two different weights)

Witchery drape pant- and birkies (see I told you this ugly shoe thing was going to be HUGE)

Patterned pant - check
Pastel pleat skirt with black trim - check
Black faux leather shorts- check
Black dress short -check

Dress short from Sportsgirl. Witchery have some good ones as well

Puffer jacket- check

This is mine from Kathmandu. They are currently on sale for $149. They are the absolute bomb, so warm, so comfy and because they are "slim" they don't make you look like a Michelin man

Long line cardigan- check (in summer weight black, winter weight black and striped).

Sportsgirl again. Mine is white and black, not black and white.

Alright maybe I exaggerated a little. There were two things on the list I didn't have.
Spotted jumper because I don't like spots and High waisted jeans. Because high waisted jeans were left in the 90's for a very, very good reason.

This is a spotted jumper (from Sussan)

This is a high waisted jean which looks ok because this woman is a model and young. They will not look this way on anyone over 20. Or  60kgs.

So where too from here? I guess all I can do is wait for summer. Because 5 black maxi dresses are NEVER enough.

Please feel free to use this list as what you need to buy to get you through to Summer.