In case you missed it, a cheeky little recap of MKR

On top of my Olympics, I also have a bit of a My Kitchen Rules crush.  We are up to the second round of people, and to be honest they are a little bit boring. We have the cutest newly married couple, who can't cook  

They are just.so.cute.

The man having a mid life crisis  who thinks he looks like a movie star who has been stuck in a mid life crisis for the last 40 years and his much younger partner who really could do better.

If I was writing her report card I would say " Could do better" Although maybe not in that hat.

The cutest young girl team who giggle and are just so nice. There are the boys who are, well, nice and can't cook and then we have the "just your average everyday" mums who up until to tonight were invisible, and then we have the obligatory bitch face moll from W.A. and her team mate"friend" who has weird tattoos on his hands. But is nice. There is that word again.

                            OMG- THEY HAVE PHOTOSHOPPED OUT HIS TATTOOS!

So tonights episode started with the two mums talking about how they were average mums with husbands and daughters.  They then got in their car and drove off to Coles to start their shopping. Unfortunately we had a bit of an editing problem because in the back seat there was a bag full of groceries. Whoops.

Once we got into Coles (they must have stopped at home because they bags were empty again). We did the run around Coles. Do we have to run? Then we hit the meat section where we bought some steak. This is when three things hit me. 
1. Bree is the alpha average mum who is bossy
2. Jess is very patient with Bree
3. Who pays for the food? Those packs of meat where $65 each. They were going to buy 4. 

After much arguing with herself Bree decided she needed 4 pieces of eye fillet. Jess just nodded her head. She knows her place in the relationship.The mums then hit the fish shop. A question. What is wrong with the seafood at Coles? Only to find there were NO LOCAL FRESH SCALLOPS. A tip- maybe call ahead. Bree pulled the alpha card again and rang around trying to find some fresh local scallops. No one had them. After arguing with herself again, because by they stage anything Jess said was irrelevant, the girls bought their 60 scallops (60 for 12 people) then the girls were on their way to set up their instant restaurant.

It looked nice,  but maybe the mums should have washed the cutlery before they used it. Then the table was ready, the close up of the clock said they were 20 minutes into there cooking time and they hit the kitchen. The obligatory "Oh no".

It was once they hit the kitchen that I think I understood the casting process of the show. You must have Coles Brand Alfoil, Plastic Wrap, Oil and Vinegar on display. You sink also needs to have Pine O Clean wipes (even if you don't use them) and some dettol hand wash. I wish the girls knew the oil was in the kitchen because then we could have saved one of the mums picking up the big bottle of oil in Coles. Whoops.

We hit our first bump when we realised " WE FORGOT TO BUY THE 4 PIECES OF MEAT". The only had 2, which looked enough to feed the guests and the crew. For a week. Whoops. Just quietly I think the producers put the meat back. I can hear the budget man at Channel 7 saying " No bloody way are we giving then $250 for steak. 

This was also around the time that I also realised that Bree has the most annoying way of pronouncing words EVER. I can not beeeelieeeveee it. She really over emphasises heeeeer vooooweeeellls.

Then the guests arrived. Everyone looked fab, even the mums who were cooking in their ball gowns. Pete and Manu arrived. They always look great. 

" Geez we scrub up well Manu"

"Yes we do Pete. Yes we do"

They read the menu. They explained how the were just average mums. Again. People were split on whether it was a  good menu (the nice ones all said nice things, the mean ones all said mean things). Personally I would have been happy to eat this meal. Scallops are my fav seafood and Steak- sorry chateau briand - béarnaise sauce and chips would be my request for a last meal. They made a mousse and mud cake for deeeeseeert.

Entree cooking went well. Control freak Bree told Jess how to cook the scallops. She was doing it wrong. It tasted amazing. Best dish in the competition. They cooked the steak. A whole 3 minutes of the episode was spent with Bree arguing with herself about whether or not she should take the steak out. She then argued with herself about whether the steak was cooked. It was. Of course it bloody waaaas. 

I think Jess is thinking of ways to belt bossy Bree around the head with the fillet.

Jess was allowed to make the béarnaise. She was doing it wrong. Apparently she was stirring to fast. Huh? But she did cut the chips well.

The steak came out. It was amaaaazing. Bree felt prouder of that steak than she did giving birth to her daughter. WHAT?? All the cliches came out. It was cooked to perfection. It was full of flavour. They nailed it. Bree did a smug smile.  Mean girl from Perth didn't like it. Of course she didn't.

The dessert came out. It looked pretty. Bree hovered over Jess to make sure she took the baking paper off properly. The judges didn't like it. The cake was too dense. Pete magically asked of this was how they always made it. Of course it wasn't. He is so clever. Especially when he has the earpiece in with the producer feeding him information.

Everyone gave their score. They gave 9's. Mean girl from Perth gave a 8. I say she gave it because her partner doesn't speak. Pete tried to give the scallops an 11. His activated almonds are obviously not brain food. The mums cried. The other contestants realised that they were not just average as they made out into first place. The mums that gave the obligatory " Is this really happening". Then cut to a preview of Sunday nights episode where mean girl from Perth is being told she has cooked the worst dish in the competition. Whoops. 

Well played mums. Well played.