Shaving your face is a thing ladies.

I have had a very boring weekend. So boring that I was looking forward to going back to work. And I have never said that. Ever.

So I did what everyone does when they have a boring weekend. I ate crunchy nut cornflakes and watched youtube tutorials. Well I also tried to film my own tutorial but I had a few too many red wines and completely messed up the smokey eye. I know it is meant to look messily tidy but this was messy messy. Lining your eyeball is not part of the technique apparently.

So watching the tutorials I came across the latest "trend". Shaving the face. For girls. Mmmm.

I have read about this before. A couple of years ago one of the ladies from Housewives of New Jersey was talking about how she did it. The I say an article which talked about the reason that mens skin was so soft was because they shaved everyday so it was really exfoliated.
Then I also remembered reading about the bearded lady at the circus.

 So shaving your face is not just a case of grabbing the old bic razor. You use products that look like this.

and have names like Tinkle (you can get these on ebay)

So what will shaving your face do for you? Well apparently it WILL make your foundation go on more smoothly and it will look flawless. According to the article I read it will NOT make the hair grow back darker or thicker.

Apparently this trend is not new, Marilyn Monroe was doing it, and it is so big in Japan that there are salons that specialise in it.

So if you are considering getting out the razor have a read of this article first- it seemed the most balanced and honest, also have a look at this video

                          

So will I be shaving my face? Hell no- I don't have time to make myself a piece of vegemite toast in the morning, let alone add another step into my beauty routine. But if you decide to go the shaved route- let me know.

Game of Thrones. I love you but don't get you. WITH SPOILERS

I love Game of Thrones. Like really, really love. But I have a confession. Half the time I have no bloody idea what the hell is going on.
I have always known this, and I watch with Google next to me. But this week was a game (no pun intended- or was it??) changer. I was so confused.
Here is my disclaimer. There are spoilers ahead. If you don't want spoilers get your shit together and keep up. Don't tell me " NO DON"T TELL ME!" and then when I ask you what episode you are up to you say "Season 2." No excuse.  I repeat. YOU ARE ABOUT TO GET SPOILERS.

Just like Jon Snow. I know nothing.

Act 1- Sansa is making a coat for Jon (as would Sansa, as would I). Then she gets a message from Little Finger (who I find strangely attractive). She goes off and sees him. Just like that. Like she has ubered a horse and off she goes. Ummmm it took you 6 season to find Jon Snow and getting to Jons house was really dangerous. But you can just jump in an Uber- meet Little Finger (who for the record I am putting it out there.... I THINK IS YOUR DAD) tell him about how awful Ramsey is and then get home in time to finish hand sewing Jon's coat.

Act 2 - Arya Stark (whose name everyone pronounces differently- even her siblings) is still doing that dumb shit about being faceless. WHYYYYYYY? We all know who the girl is. Or is she just confused because no one pronounces her name right? Is that why she feels like no one? All she bloody does is get hit by that really mean girl and then Jesus keeps talking about no faces and sends her off to kill people and watch a play that sum up 6 seasons of Game of Thrones in 5 minutes. Seriously Arya there is no reason to train to be an assassin- leave it to the script writers. They will all be dead soon. Who was it you were trying to kill anyway? Even Google has forgotten.

Act 3- Back to Bran- who by now I wish was still missing. His flash back dreams are confusing the hell out of me and now he is surrounded by these dumb arse goblins (when did we meet them?) who made up the White Walkers? Huh? What?

Act 4 - The crew of the Black Pearl are waiting for the call up for Pirates of the Caribbean Part 24. While they are still in costume the Producers decide to write them in as members of the kingdom of some dirty smelling sea place. The only highlight is poor whats his face who got his you know what cut off by Ramsey running off with his sister with the boats so they are all on set for when Johnny Depp needs the money to pay off Amber Heard in the divorce.

Act 5- That good looking old guy who looks like Robert Redford (honestly what is his characters name and where did he come from? I know he was there at the start but like seriously - who the hell are you????) asks Daenerys what is a good moisturiser to use on his very dry skin because he noticed last week when she was starkers that her skin was smooth as a babies bottom. She sent him off to find a Priceline to get some Nivea. I hope she remembered to give him her Priceline card.

Act 6- Tyrian talks to a new red witch who I thought was the old red witch (haha- see what I did there old? because she is old when she takes the necklace off) but she is not the old red witch. There are like lots of them. She told the gossipy gay man( I am not judging- I love a good gossipy gay man) stuff which I didn't understand.  

Act 7- Bran is still being a smart arse teenager and is doing what he has been told not to by the old man stuck in the tree and time travels- and meets the white walker who grabs his arm. Then Bran wakes up the old guy in the tree who is really, really mad and talks to him like I talk to one of my students when I have told them not to do something which they go ahead and do anyway.

Act 8 - Sansa, Jon Snow and all their friends play monopoly. Other stuff may have happened but Jon Snow was in the scene so I wasn't paying attention. I was side tracked by how well he is wearing his half up man bun.Then he and Sansa chatted while the other Night Watchers exploded bean bags and those balls went everywhere. And he said thanks for the coat. Although to be honest I think he was thinking ' Bloody hell just lost that friggin black crow coat and now this- has no one heard of microfibre???"

Act 9- The Head White Walker finds Bran (which isn't hard because he like... can't walk) gets found by the very tall white walker with the cast of zombies from Pirates of the Caribbean who are waiting for the call up as well (see act 4). The little pixies get killed which is a bit crappy because they made them because they thought the humans where shit (bet they are regretting that move). The girl who I swear is the same girl who wants to be queen of the smelling sea people runs off with Bran who won't for the love of God wake up ( typical friggin teenagers). She tells Hodor to " HOLD THE DOOR". Bran is dreaming of Hodor as a child having a fit yelling " Hold the door" which turns into " Hodor"- which to be honest is a bit of a stretch -and by now I'm so confused about the whole time travel thing that I forget to cry when Hodor get totally smashed by the white walkers. And died. As did his dog.

Exhausted and confused all I can say is. I BLOODY LOVE THIS SHOW.

Until Monday Jon Snow. Until Monday.

Who wakes up from being dead looking like this??

Just winging it

I think if they were going to make a movie about my life I think maybe that's what it should be call - Just winging it. ( I also think they should get Margot Robbie to play me. )

This isn't me. This is Margot Robbie. Why are you laughing?

I didn't realise how much I do just wing it until this week when I was co presenting a session for teachers and the co presenter was like really organised and we had a meeting to discuss what we would do. I had planned to think about it 5 minutes before and hope for the best. She was great. Super organised. The Ying to my Yang.

This weeks Youtube video is about liquid eyeliner- because who doesn't like liquid eyeliner. But who the bloody hell can put on liquid eyeliner? And then when you can put it on - how do you get the wingey thing?

So on a quiet Saturday night I decided to film you a tutorial. It was a disaster. I filmed it with the radio on so I couldn't use the audio, I made mistakes, I finished the makeup- hated it- took it off- got eye make up remover in my eyes- got black shit everywhere including the back of my arm. And the table. And the floor. And on the dog.

When I finally finished the tutorial I was happy. Then when I watched it back today- mmm not so happy. My wing is not winged enough. But that is the trick when you are older. Your eye cannot handle a big wing. It takes over your face. So it is more of a delicate flick. 

So have a look, have a practice because soon we are going to be doing the night time look that everyone wants..... Yep - we are going to learn how to do Adele's makeup. You will never say hello the same way again.

Here is the link to the Youtube tutorial. Click on the arrow!

So have a look- and have a laugh. Because in the end I was just winging it. ( see what I did there? )

I'm in a clothing rut.

I love clothes. Like totally love. I have so many clothes it is a bit embarrassing. Although it would appear that I don't have as many clothes as one of my work friends who has 51 dresses. Yes 51. She asked me if that was excessive. My reply was  that if she loves each and every one of them it is perfectly acceptable. 

One of my other friends is going through a time of "cleansing". It has a real name but I can't remember what it is, but it goes like this- you hold you stuff and if it doesn't bring you joy- get rid of it. I don't even need to say that all my clothes bring me joy. But the problem- which isn't really a problem - is that all my clothes are either black, white or grey and if I am feeling really daring I will throw in the odd stripe.  

My work uniform for winter is an oversized jumper with leggings. And a scarf. And boots. Thats it. Done. Comfy, classic and practical. Hopefully a bit stylish.

So this Winter I have decided to mix things up a bit. I have revamped my wardrobe and I have bought dresses. And I have introduced florals. FLORALS. 

My floral dress. From The Iconic- Atmos and Here. It was about $50. I got a larger size so it was a bit longer.

                                             

Well let me tell you it hasn't been an easy transition. For a variety of reasons.

1. Dresses and teaching don't go together very well.
I teach a subject which requires me to at times crawl under desks to connect cables. I have to bend over and fix computers. I even have to bend over to write on the board. In a dress this is hard. I was actually doing squats when trying to write what makes a Baz Luhrman film popular to an audience. (Yes that is really part of my job) It's hard to convince boys that Leo Di Caprio is hot when your thighs are burning.

Another of my dresses. Once again from The Iconic- Atmos and Here 

                                             

2. People look at you weird.
I can't tell you how many puzzled looks I get. The look that says ' You look wrong", or "It's nice... but not like what you wear." I understand. I look at the mirror and get confused. Kind of like when I open the camera on my phone and it is on selfie mode and I see an old person staring back at me. And then realise it's me.

3. People keep asking if I'm going to a job interview.
No- I'm just trying to look like a lady.

4. It's a but uncomfortable.
I have to keep pulling them down, checking you can't see my knickers, pulling them up to check you can't see my boobs and pulling up my tights. Why do they call them tights if they are not tight?

This is the tree pose. Yes I do stand like this. Prayer hands are optional- depending on how bad the kids are. If you are teaching Year 8's your hands are constantly in this position.

5. You have to stand and sit nicely.
I stand weird. My comfy way to stand is the Tree Yoga pose. Or I like to sit on a desk. Or sometimes I even do a bit of both-I stand but with one leg on the desk. In a dress I can't do this. I have to stand or sit nicely. Like I am Princess Kate sitting on the bench in front of the Taj Mahal. ( I have also been practising being dull to complete the look).Do you know how hard it is to sit without crossing your legs?

Yep- this is how I am now sitting. Complete with blow dry. But without the Prince.

                           
So I am sticking with it. I think I might try and reintroduce some of my staples back in, but I will keep up some variety. Mix things up, keep people on their toes. Get out of my rut. I might even go really crazy and introduce a whole colour. Like purple. Just not yet.